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Joke of the Day
"*lights dim in restaurant* DATE: did it just become sexier in here? ME: I CAN'T SEE MY MENU"
Next Joke
"Some of my friends are doctors and human rights activists and I just spent the last 22 minutes trying to open a pistachio."
"What do women and Tony Stark have in common? They are both Fe Males."
"What do you call a blonde in a closet? Last years hide and seek champion"
"Spent the entire day milking a single almond."
"""Your teeth are like the stars"" he said As he pressed her hand so white. He spoke the truth for like the stars Her teeth came out at night!"
"Did you hear the story about the man with five penises? His pants fit like a glove."
"The new sponge in the sink just brightened my day a little. Being an adult is stupid."
"My kid is almost old enough for social media so we'll need to have ""the talk"" soon. You know, about your/you're and their/there/they're."
"My Thai girlfriend assured me that a small penis should never be an issue in a loving relationship. I still wish she didn't have one though"