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Joke of the Day

"Most of us can keep a secret. It's the people we tell it to who can't."

Next Joke
 
"An identity thief... takes things personally"
"I bet centaurs never know who to root for at rodeos."
"Pavlov walks into a bar and hears a loud bell. ""Oh shit,"" he exclaims. ""I forgot to feed my dogs."""
"A local establishment wants to press charges on me for getting an erection on their property. Luckily for me, they have no hard evidence."
"Hey, baby, are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside you."
"Why DID David Cameron fuck a dead pig, anyway? The live ones wouldn't hold still."
"Niece: found these handcuffs in your drawer. Me: yea I got arrested once Niece: omg why Me: for going through my aunt's drawers."
"There are three people in this world... Those who can count, and those you can not."
"Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To see he's flat mate"