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Joke of the Day

"A local establishment wants to press charges on me for getting an erection on their property. Luckily for me, they have no hard evidence."

"Where does a snowman keep his money? In a snow bank!"

"Outbreak - New Strain of Bird Flu Discovered!!! It's called Chirpies. It's a Canarial Disease. It's Untweetable."

"Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because the parrots eat them all"

"I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis"

"I named my dick the truth, because the truth hurts, and you can't handle the truth!"

"Just got added to a list called ""people."" Glad I made that cut."

"Anyone that tells you beer isn't a solution clearly didn't pay attention in science class."

"I was sold a calculator with the plus button missing. Something doesn't quite add up."

"They should have an Academy Award for ""Most Acting."""