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Joke of the Day

"If women can do anything that men can do, then why haven't they ever suppressed an entire gender before? Its a joke lady's."

"Cop: ""Excuse me have you been drinking tonight?"" Me: ""I've been draanking.. I've been draanking.. watermeloon.."" cop: ""surfbort"""

"Do you have any naked pictures of your girlfriend on your phone??? No?? Want me to send some to you?"

"What does an Italian cow say when he gets an extra delivery of hay to the barn? That's amorehay!"

"When I was a kid I could go to a corner store with a $1 and get 2 cokes, 1 kitkat and a gum Nowadays there are CCTV cameras everywhere"

"Bank called asking if my credit card had been stolen. They were concerned because it hadn't been used at the liquor store since LAST Friday."

"knock knock... who's there? Honeycomb Honeycomb who? Honeycomb your hair."

"Why did the rabbit cross the road? Because the chicken had his Easter eggs!"

"AMA Request: Innocent, uneducated rapist"

"You know you have an awesome bra... when you can do the entire Head and Shoulders, Knees and Toes' song.... with just a slight adjustment of the shoulder straps!"