111942

Joke of the Day

"What does FEMINISM stands for? **F**ighting **E**quality and **M**en to **I**nstitutionalize **N**arcissism and **I**gnorance and **S**top **M**eritocracy"

"MONDAY: BROUGHT TO YOU BY A GENEROUS GRANT FROM THE FUCK THIS SHIT FOUNDATION"

"With all these regulations and safety hazards about burgers... Rare meat is hard to find."

"A new study shows that un-vaccinated children are less likely to be autistic because they are more likely to be dead."

"What do you call an amorous vampire? A neck-romancer"

"My great-grandmother lived to be 106 and never needed glasses. She always just drank straight from the bottle."

"What is the difference between a lentil and a chick pea? Well, for starters I would never pay $200 to have a lentil on my face."

"Did you hear about that mathematician who only used furniture made out of clocks? He loved his times tables."

"What did the hipster say... ...when he was told to get off the couch? ""Nah-imma-stay"""

"I don't have a dirty mind... I have a sexy imagination!"