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Joke of the Day

"Watching Grey's Anatomy teaches me that if I'm really sad, I should walk slowly down a corridor to a Snow Patrol track."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Is there a punchline that could make this joke funny?"

"Why is Stephen Hawking successful? He can't run away from his responsibilities."

"Just put my money where my mouth is. Pennies taste disgusting."

"Someone should tell Pam at work that no one wants to hear how cool her boyfriend is unless she's dating a helicopter."

"Do you know what's the hardest about being a narcissist? Well, when I'm looking in the mirror, me."

"Don't forget to insult random strangers on the internet today, morons. <3"

"Just calculated my BMI and found out I should be 47ft tall."

"As horses say to one another. Any friend of yours is a palomino!"

"This day in history. 1701. Maryland legalized divorce in cases where the wife displeased their clergyman. What kind of kinky cult was that?"