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Joke of the Day

"Jesus walks into a hotel Lays a handful of nails on the counter and asks the attenant ""Can you put me up for the night?"""

Next Joke
 
"So my friend is dating twins... ...And I said, ""Isn't it hard to tell them appart?"" He replied with, ""Well not really, the brother has a moustache."""
"""Peanuts, big butts, M&M's, large butts, raisins, huge butts."" - Sir Trail Mix-a-Lot"
"What is a pirates favorite letter? P. Because without it, he'd be irate."
"Just shook a piece of cellophane off my finger and now I'm exhausted."
"My toddler tried out and age aproporiate pickup line ""Hey baby, you've got some fiiiiiiine motor skills."""
"Um, I'm not ""complaining"" of chest pains *glares at paramedic* don't make this heart attack sound bratty"
"What's the difference between jam and marmalade? I can't marmalade my dick up your ass."
"There are 3 types of people in the world... Those who can count and those who can't"
"ME *sees baby crab in stroller*: He's so cute! I just wanna rip his lil legs off dip em in butter and eat them! MOM CRAB *beaming*: thank u"