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Joke of the Day
"As I suspected, someone's been removing soil from my garden. The plot thins."
Next Joke
"Didn't sleep much but I got a few solid hours of worrying done."
"Having dinner with my phone and some people."
"Did you know? If you took a man's small intestine and stretched it all the way out from end to end, you would go to jail."
"What is the worst icebreaker? The Titanic"
"What is the similarity between an airplane and a woman? The cockpit"
"I hate when girls have ""taken"" in their bio like that movie wasn't even that good"
"I don't see why everyone likes circles so much They're so pointless."
"Just heard a weird noise from the other room, but refuse to call out ""Is anyone there?"" I've seen the movies...those people always die!"
"Apparently the Japanese made a pie chart showing how afraid they are of Godzilla... then one of them made it their national flag."