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Joke of the Day

"The penguin is mightier than the swordguin."

"I started cheating on my wife for better BDSM Whoops, wrong sub."

"I'm not a god. I'm a regular guy who just happens to be immortal and perfect in every way. There's a difference."

"We are gathered here today because Somebody ""glares at coffin "" couldn't stay alive."

"Did you guys hear about the movie called Constipation? It hasn't come out yet."

"Today I Learned.... Jumble Boogie browrearrr browrearrr"

"My doctor wanted a stool sample a urine sample and a semen sample. So I gave him my underwear. Classic Rodney D"

"Medusa's hair is made of snakes. Does the carpet match the drapes?"

"What's the instrument of oppression? the Trumpet"

"Whenever I see a bear on a motorbike I'm like, ""Good for you. You've not let the fact you can't be tattooed stop you from getting a bike."""