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Joke of the Day

"*knocks on donation door Me: I have a donation Salvation Army: Ma'am, once again... you cannot donate your man Me: You have stupid rules!"

"Republican parents have no problem buying toy guns for their kids. Democrats refuse to do so. That is why their kids pretend to shoot each other with dolls."

"Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water."

"If guys were smart they would forget the nightclubs and watch the supermarket for girls buying frozen dinners and cat food."

"What does my cat and Donald Trump have in common? Neither of them pay taxes"

"A lady said I was catching up to... her in terms of age. I said she must be moving too fast."

"Why do Scuba divers fall backwards off the boat, and into the water? Because if they fell forward, they'd fall into the boat."

"If i had $1 for every time i got called beautiful.. I'd have $1. Thanks mom."

"Did you hear the one about the girl that went deep sea fishing with four guys? She came back with a red snapper."

"I told my dad that I was taking a C programming course. He offered to give me some pointers."