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Joke of the Day

"What does a tire made of potatoes have? An inner tuber."

"It's a difficult day for me today. Today is the day I tell my dog that I am not his biological mother and that his real mother was a bitch."

"I just passed by Canadian citizenship test! I got an eh +"

"There are eleven types of people in the world... those who understand binary, and ten other types of people."

"butts are truly the final frontier. to think we know more about SPACE than we do about the human butt. two fleshy mounds of mystery & wonder"

"Pooh: There's a rumbly in my tumbly Piglet: What? Pooh: There's. A. Rumbly. In. My. Tumbly Piglet: Pooh: I'm hungry Piglet: Say that then"

"I'm going to open a restaraunt called pantera bread It will be similar to panera bread, but the food we serve will be much heavier"

"In New York someone gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor bastard."

"My friend asked me how long I'v been married. I told him 15 years, but with the wind chill it feels like 30"

"accountant: ""youre basically broke"" wife: ""he keeps spending money on stupid stuff"" me: ""lets ask the dog if he thinks his jeans are stupid"""