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Joke of the Day

"I wish I had a job where I could just punch stupid motherfuckers in the face all day."

"Fellas, here's a flirting tip: If a girl plays with her hair while taking to you, it means she has lice and you should stay away from her."

"PSA: Don't get a cheap circumcision. Usually, it's a rip-off."

"Yoko Ono is apparently being lined up to assist with the bush tucker trials in the I'm a Celebrity jungle. After all she has been living off a dead beetle for the last 36 years."

"As I've gotten older, my answer to any problem, more and more, is ""burn it down""."

"What do you call a Slavic spouse? Czech-mate"

"No thanks, Trix cereal. I have enough drama in my life without a rabbit trying to steal my breakfast."

"Which one of the ten men won the pun contest? No pun in ten did!"

"WebMD just diagnosed me as fergalicious"

"My girlfriend asked me: ""If you won the lottery, would you still love me?"" And I answered: ""Of course! I'd miss you, but I still love you"""