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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the American Indian who died from drinking too much tea? He drowned in his own tepee!"

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"Not Wally, Not Wally, Not Wally, Not Wally, Not Wally,Not Wally... *from the Where's Wally Audiobook*"
"If you see an Apple store getting robbed.... Does that make you an iWitness?"
"Oscar Pistorius found guilty of murder Police say he is now on the run."
"Chinese takeout, $15.00, gas to get there, $1.50.... ... Getting home to find they've forgotten one of your dishes. ... ... Riceless."
"Where do pregnant chickens keep their ultrascan images? In a photo albumen. \_()_/ "
"DRAGON: get AWAY from me ME: let me pet ur scales pls DRAGON: I don't even KNOW u ME: breathe fire on me DRAGON: *is creeped out*"
"Hey couples on Facebook that share an account, so which one of you got caught having an affair?"
"Dad shouts: ""Stop watching porn, I can hear it in my room!"" Son: ""Dad.. I'm not watching porn, that is Maria Sharapova playing Tennis!"""
"I'm playing dead at work right now so nobody will talk to me. Everyone is screaming. Probably should have used less fake blood."