10774

Joke of the Day

"""Gunman"" is too cool-sounding. Can we start calling them something that conveys weakness, like ""pistoleer?"""

"Don't think I won't spin around and French kiss you if you're standing too close to me in line at the liquor store."

"Knock,Knock joke Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him."

"Give me five hundred good reasons you think I'm too demanding."

"Why Can't America tell knock knock jokes? Cause' freedom RINGS!"

"Basketball would be a lot more exciting if each team was allowed one bear."

"With God all things are possible; but with money all things are probable. And with a good accountant, they're all deductible."

"No one beats the Jackson 5! Except their father."

"Karate classes... Because breaking boards on your head is all cool and shit if a House ever starts attacking you."

"Jokes to Cheer someone up Okay, my best friend is feeling down, and I want to help cheer her up. Give me your best jokes for the occasion!"