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Joke of the Day

"Celebrity dumping an ice bucket on himself to raise money? Cute. Humanity dumping an ice cap on itself to raise sea levels? HILARIOUS."

"In biology they ask us what we find in cells Apparently black people wasn't the right answer. I'll see myself out."

"[barber shop] BARBER: what can we do for you today? MEDUSA: well.. [removes hat] BARBER: MEDUSA: BARBER: so do you want more or less snakes?"

"What does the bee Santa Claus say ? Ho hum hum !"

"What do you give to the man who has everything? Penicillin."

"A man walks into a bar . . . He says ""Ow""."

"Top UN officials asked Vladimir Putin to stop annexing countries He responded: Oh go Crimea river"

"Nothing like an old high school crush finding you & friending you on Facebook because he needs cows or some shit for Farmville."

"I treat my women like I treat my super cars I enjoy them a lot and they only exist in my dreams"

"This guy came up to me and told me that he fucked my mom My step dad is weird as fuck"