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Joke of the Day

"Me: Has anyone ever told you, you have the softest brown eyes? Her: No. Besides, my eyes are blue. Me: No wonder nobody's ever told you..."

"I'm a shy little Pebble.... I wish to be a little Bolder"

"Thanks for never punching me in the face, most people."

"What do you call a disabled paedophile? A creepy crawly"

"Best/Worst Pick-Up Line ""My dick just died... Can I bury it in your ass?"""

"I don't call it ""laziness."" I call it ""selective participation."""

"I'm planning on being more spontaneous in the future"

"Who rode a dog and was a confederate general during the American Civil War ? Robert E Flea !"

"I would tell you a butter joke... But you would probably just spread it."

"What's an 80 year old pussy smell like? Depends!"