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Joke of the Day

"Everclear songs are really easy to play on guitar It's because their dad's weren't around to give them music lessons."

"I do this fun trick at parties where no one there likes me so I don't go."

"Emailing teachers be like Me: *polite greeting, multiple paragraphs, perfect grammar* Professor: ""sure"" -sent from my iPhone"

"Dream carefully, because dreams come true."

"Give a man a fish, feed him for a day give a man a poisoned fish, feed him for a lifetime"

"A school is like a barcode, It's a P.O.S."

"The furniture store keeps calling me to come back. But all I wanted was that one night stand."

"It's nice that the french finally grew some balls... ...and shot down a German plane but unfortunately the war ended 70 years ago."

"10th anniversary So my girlfriends dad just accused me of pedophilia, she is 18 and I am 32. It ruined our 10th anniversary"

"Politics are like a dick. They keep on getting rammed down my throat."