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Joke of the Day

"Jesus isn't one to get angry very often.. But I remember seeing him once looking very cross"

"Why didn't the man report his stolen credit card? The thief was spending less than his wife."

"We will require you to do something somewhat onerous and time-comsuming and then introduce impediments to completing it. - my employer"

"I'm working on organizing a circlejerk. It's coming together."

"Did you hear about the sensitive thief? He took a fence."

"Haven't listened to Staind since middle school... ...it's been awhile"

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? (Nsfw) I can't jelly my dick in your sisters ass!"

"How do you tell an astronaut where they're going? Straight up."

"when it's april 2nd and she still pregnant"

"Why did the brake pedal see a therapist? Because it was depressed."