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Joke of the Day
"Did you hear about the sensitive thief? He took a fence."
Next Joke
"The only good part about choking to death on Teddy Grahams is your family can technically say you were killed by bears. Which sounds cool."
"How many vegetables should you pull out of the ground in one day? None"
"Killed my first 8 point buck of the season! But it was with the front end of my truck so fuck my life..."
"If a man holds the car door open for a women, then you know that one of the two is new."
"Someone asked me if I'm ever scared that I'll be alone forever, which I thought was so rude because my dog was RIGHT THERE."
"Can I just drop it like it's lukewarm? It's been a long day and I'm tired."
"My mates called me stingy so I decided to buy them a beer. Turns out they wanted one each."
"Guess who i am I am a long object. You put me in your mouth and shake me. Then you either swallow or spit out white liquid . Yes, it is me your toothbrush"
"Crazy ex's are like a box of chocolates They'll kill your dog"