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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a gay French baker? A faguette"

"Women are like convertibles. They're a lot more fun when the top's down."

"Dad: Remember when I told you Santa wasnt real Me: Yea Dad: There's one more thing Me: Don't say it Dad: Retirement Me: *sobs uncontrollably"

"I like the term urban camper We all know you mean you're homless, but it's less awkward because it has the word camping in it. For all we know you could be roasting smores under a bridge or some shit."

"What is an over protective German father's favorite game? Sudoku a game of neins!"

"Is it just me, or do toasters have like 4 settings too many? They should have 1 setting that reads: ""Toast"""

"*holds ""bunny ears"" over someone's head for five hours as they have their portrait painted*"

"'NSFW' Why didn't Mrs. Claus ever have kids? Because Santa always comes down the chimney."

"Apparently shouting out ""he has a gun"" isn't the best way to let everyone in the bank know that you see the security guard. I know this now."

"*Getting murdered* omg I have the exact same knives"