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Joke of the Day

"A vegan took my picture. It was hard to smile saying, ""Gluten-free, dairy-free, imitation monteray jack soy cheese."""

"You know the joke about this guy playing with a loaded gun? Triggered."

"'Kyrgyzstan' is what happens when you've already named all the other countries and you have left over letters."

"My 12yo son's protip: Buy larger sized clothes and you'll look like you lost weight. You're welcome."

"Good Cop: We want to help you. Just tell us who was with you on the night of August the 15th. Bae Cop: My parents aren't home. Come over."

"I loaned a blind guy some money... It's ok though. He said he'd pay me back next time he saw me."

"If I was a vampire, pretty sure I'd find a way to cover blood in cheese."

"how do you hide from hitler? Standstill.... he can nazi."

"STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backward."

"What is the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has the pricks outside."