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Joke of the Day
"I like my women like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer."
Next Joke
"My grandfather always said, ""Don't watch your money; watch your health."" So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather. (Jackie Mason)"
"Why do people always talk in absolutes? I would never do that. It's the worst."
"Q: Why do blondes always drink with straws? A: Practice."
"What is Robin Williams doing in heaven? Not sure, probably just hanging out."
"How does a baby ghost cry? ""Boo-hoo! Boo-hoo!"""
"What do native American and modern day American society have in common? Navaho lot."
"I'd rather vote for Monica Lewinsky than Hillary Clinton... ...because at least a little bit of Bill rubbed off on Monica!"
"I will NEVER go bungee jumping... I came into this world because of broken rubber, no way am I leaving the same way"
"Walking with our phones, we all look like Star Trek crew members trying to get a life form reading on an uncharted planet."