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Joke of the Day
"I shall play you the song of my people *stomach growls*"
Next Joke
"Why do gay men hate Jesus? It took him three days to rise again."
"Did you know people are getting paid to mention products in their Facebook statuses?.....That's as crazy as the low low prices at Dave's Furniture Emporium"
"Wife:Have you seen the bag of dog treats? Me:*flashback of drunk me eating what I thought was a bag of beef jerky.. No? W: Really? Idiot."
"""God is dead, but like, dead in a fun way"" - Nietzsche trying to make a first date less awkward"
"Told a female Redditor my dick was long... She asked ""we talkin' 'r/TIFU' long or 'r/Jokes' long?"" TIFU by saying Jokes...."
"I love slip on shoes because you can slip them off just as easy to hit stupid people with them."
"What are the worst six years in a blonde's life? Third Grade!"
"*Leonardo Dicapreo goes up to accept oscar* *pulls out speech* *blows dust off of it* Yes I'd like to thank the directors of titanic for th-"
"It's amazing the little things you learn about your kids as they grow everyday. For example today I learned my 3yo is kind of a mean drunk."