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Joke of the Day

"Me: Your generation sits around with their noses in their phones Niece: Your generation made the guys who wrote the Macarena rich Me: ..."

"If you make a cow angry how will she get even? She'll cream you!"

"What did the Buddhist Monk say to the Hot Dog Vendor? ""Make me one with everything"" (assuming he would be able to talk in the first place)"

"Apple fitness products don't work. I tried the iHop and it only made me gain weight."

"I named my dick ""The Truth"" Because bitches can't handle it."

"Why do people hesitate before registering as an organ donor? It takes guts."

"OH MY GOD THE INSPIRATIONAL TWEETS ARE COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE"

"The inventor of the air conditioner has died Thousands of fans are attending his funeral"

"I hate when I'm in a room with 3 other people, & I have to shove the entire kit kat in my mouth."

"When I awoke from the accident and they told me my fingers were broken... it was hard to grasp."