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Joke of the Day

"Why are lilypads round? So that it's easier for the hippos to jump on them."

"Summer: Hair gets lighter. Skin gets darker. Water gets warmer. Drinks get colder. Music gets louder. Nights get longer. Life gets better. CAN'T WAIT!"

"I overheard my daughter asking the little boy next door, ""Are you the opposite sex, or am I."""

"I work in the entertainment industry, so the only way I could lie more is if I worked in politics."

"Sometimes, to impress girls, I use big words that I don't fully understand... ...in an effort to sound more photosynthesis."

"The people in this ad look 'indie' & remind me of myself. As a consumer this makes me feel good. Now I will purchase all their products"

"Cop: Know why I pulled you over? Me: Yeah Cop: Oh ok nevermind"

"A political joke for Americans I'm voting for hillary"

"What do you call a rich Asian? *Cha Ching!*"

"Knock knock... Who's there? Dunup Dunup who?"