103819

Joke of the Day

"There is no way alcohol kills more people than it creates"

"I like my women like I like my whiskey.. Inanimate."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Brother ! Brother who ? Brother-ation I've forgotten your name !"

"As a white person, I have a primal fear of getting lost in the snow."

"Me: My friend really likes you. Her: I'm a lesbian. Me: Ah ok... Her: ... Me: ... Her: ... Me: So... What part of Lesbia are you from?"

"A horse walks into a bar. .. A horse walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says, ""Why the long face?"" Sarah Jessica Parker responds, ""I'm a person you know? I have feelings!"""

"Why did the black man walk backwards? I have no idea, Your Honor, but he was coming right at me and I felt my life was at risk."

"I'm Torn on the Issue of Abortion.... On one hand, I support it because it is killing babies. On the other hand, it gives women a choice. Credit goes where credit's due, /u/DJ-Salinger"

"What was the first thing Abraham Lincoln told his friends when they asked him how he got an STD? Four whore and seven beers ago...."

"A hamburger walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says,""Sorry, we don't serve food here."""