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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes it's hard to nap at work. Like, when the boss is standing beside you or when you don't have a job."

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"I had to stop drinking, cause I got tired of waking up in my car driving 90."
"Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the do-it-yourself type."
"Have I told you about my vacation to Oklahoma? It went fucking horribly."
"The spider in my shower was probably relieved to get washed down the drain after the view of me he got from that angle."
"When David shot Goliath, there was a giant thunderstorm. He was just slinging in the rain."
"I never understood why it was popular in AOL chatrooms back in the day to ask if others had neurodegenerative diseases.... Squishyquake81: ""Hi, ASL"""
"Prince's housekeeper of 30 years was offered a job as a crime scene investigator. She was considered highly qualified due to her decades of experience dusting for Prince."
"What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? You don't tell her anything anymore, you've already explained twice."
"The great English actor Colin Firth walks into a bar. Who walks in after him? Colin Thecond"