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Joke of the Day

"Height Q: What is the height of honesty? A: A pregnant lady takes one and a half ticket in the bus Q: What is the height of dishonesty? A: She gives birth to twins"

"I'm working on a screenplay called '127 Seconds' about my fat co-worker getting his hand stuck in a Pringles tube."

"A severed foot... ...is the ultimate stocking stuffer. - Mitch Hedberg"

"Who Found America Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did."

"So Lisa said she wanted to be friends with benefits Where's my dental plan, you slut? (source, college humor)"

"Why did the rooster cross the road? To prove he wasn't a chicken!"

"My jokes are still in alpha. Hopefully soon they'll get beta."

"I just fucked up instant oatmeal like some kind of husband in a commercial."

"Sugar is the only word in English language in which ""Su"" is pronounced as ""Shu"". I am pretty sure about it."

"What's an empty suit of armor doing on the drivers side of a car? He went out for the knight. OK I'll leave now"