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Joke of the Day

"I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely... ...if cowboy architects had just made their towns big enough for everyone."

"My Grandpa said, our generation relies too much on technology I replied, ""No, your generation relies too much on technology!"" Then I unplugged his life support."

"Q: What insect lives on nothing? A: Moths, because they eat holes."

"I used to be a taxi driver but I had to quit... I couldn't stand people talking behind my back."

"A university in the United States was robbed of a whopping $170,000 One student managed to erase his own debt."

"What's the difference between a Greyhound terminal and a lobster with a boob job? One's a crusty bus station."

"A woman walks into a green grocers. She asks the man behind the counter for a cucumber. He asks her: ""Whole or sliced?"" She replies: ""I've got a fanny, not a fucking slot machine!"""

"As a middle class first world citizen, I still feel I know just as much about working in a sweatshop in China as the children themselves. After all, I've walked a mile in their shoes."

"What do you call 200 white men chasing a black man? The PGA Tour."

"""On my way"" I said, pretending to drive my bed."