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Joke of the Day

"An actor was fired from a movie for being a cocaine addict. He kept blowing his lines."

"How does the man in the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it."

"The difference between a girlfriend and a girl friend... is a little chasm I call the friend zone."

"So I ordered the 50 cent at the bar last night... The bartender gave me 9 shots and took all my money"

"Your cough turns me on ""That's sick."""

"When I was young I wanted to join the basketball team... but the coach said they didn't need more basket balls"

"What was the primary role of the aristocrats during the French revolution? They put their head into it."

"Under Bush we had 3 Shrek movies. Under Obama we had 1. Can we really trust a president whose #1 goal was to bring down the Shrek franchise?"

"Why are Americans so good at shooting? They have the best schools for it."

"My black cat just ate my four leaf clover. That can't be good......."