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Joke of the Day

"Smokey The Bear is the narc version of Yogi Bear."

"My daughter asked me if I know how to do the Running Man, like my generation didn't invent it. Anyway, that's what brings me to the ER."

"My Granddad committed suicide. He drove off a cliff. Everyone was screaming and shouting at him telling him not to do it. Then again he was a bus driver."

"Don't listen to people who tell you not to stay up late. They're just trying to trick you into being a well-rested person who isn't anxious."

"I bet my girlfriend she couldnt tell me something that made me both happy and sad. So she told me that I had the biggest penis out of all my friends."

"How do you kill a hipster? Push them into the mainstream and watch them tumblr"

"How do you catch the Easter Bunny? Hide in the bushes and make a noise like a carrot!"

"Whenever I get a ""Final Notice"" letter from a bill collector, I assume this concludes our business transaction."

"Godzilla, Mothra, and Battra all walk into a bar... The building owner must now pay $100,000 due to property damage."

"My autocorrect just changed ""I'm off"" to ""I'm DTF"" and changed a casual conversation with my boss into an H.R meeting."