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Joke of the Day

"Prank Caller- Hello! is your refrigerator running?? Me- No, but the dishwasher is.. Prank Caller- Huh??? Me- Yeah my wife's out on a jog..."

"Before college I didn't have a degree, or money, or any idea what I was doing with my life. But NOW I have a degree."

"I just bought a nice 12 year old scotch His parents weren't very pleased."

"If Hitler were a black supremacist English teacher what would the Holocaust be called? White-out."

"When I see a car with a Romney bumper sticker driving near a car with an Obama sticker I want them to turn into transformers & battle"

"What I said : Just a trim, please. What hairdresser must've heard : Give me the Kim Jong-un."

"Why did the cyclops quit his job as a teacher? He only had one pupil."

"How do you make a shortcut? With small scissors."

"Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it"

"Me: Hello darkness, my old friend. Darkness: New phone, who dis?"