139148

Joke of the Day

"Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it"

"I was sitting on an automatic toilet yesterday and it flushed underneath me before I was done. Scared the shit outta me."

"Why do they use liquid soap in the Navy? Takes longer to pick up."

"My grandparents, parents, and even my siblings have chronic diarrhea... runs in the family"

"Personal ad: Handsome man (29), seeks short, open minded women to poke him in the eye with umbrellas. Busy streets only. No names please."

"My wd-40 can rusted. It was irony."

"What did the fish say when he hit the wall? damn."

"Nancy Reagan didn't have to die... But she said no to drugs."

"What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you fucking racist!"

"Don't blindfold an Asian with a shoe lace. That's lacist."