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Joke of the Day

"I sleep better naked and it's more comfortable WHY CAN'T THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT UNDERSTAND THIS?"

"Did you hear about the Aggie that moved to Oklahoma? Raised the I.Q. of both states."

"Q: A word that defines ""a quick, clever reply to an insult or criticism."" Sorry, this was ""a riposte""."

"What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A pedophile."

"Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks."

"Anxiety is like..[doesn't finish the simile due to crippling self doubt and the worry that people will think badly of me]"

"What do you call five black people having sex? A threesome."

"What is Reddit's favorite pirate? Neckbeard"

"Kanye West demanded everyone to stand while giving a eulogy, didn't go through with it because Some asshole in a coffin didn't feel like standing."

"I'll be remembering Pearl Harbor by getting bombed this evening."