100723

Joke of the Day

"My wife: ever since you got on twitter you never listen or talk to me any more. Me: yeah spaghetti for sure!"

"When cows jump over barbed wire fences.... there is udder destruction!"

"Why was Peter Pan a bad boxer? His punches Neverland."

"Happy anniversary to the love of my life.. and her husband Jonathan."

"""Age is just a number."" ""Yeah? Jail is just a room."""

"Don't ever leave a bag of mini Heath bars at your desk to prove you can't be tempted.... Because Satan's game is strong"

"The richest man in the world will be the one who creates a pair of sunglasses that automatically plays a guitar solo when slightly lowered."

"What's the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews? Harry made it out of the chamber."

"You hear about the guy who was accused of jerking off with hand soap for his erectile disfunction? Well, he finally came clean."

"My dishwasher has racks on racks I'm not talking about the machine"