100702

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the accountant that audited the greengrocer? Sure was a turnip for the books"

"Take me to a bar on an empty stomach and see how quickly I can become much more entertaining than the entire cast of Jersey Shore."

"Beating your wife isn't a joke It's a punchline."

"What's an ephebophile? A pedophile with a thesaurus."

"Roses are red violets are blue celery is green bees are black and yellow please help me I can't stop pumpkins are orange satan is vermillion"

"So there's a flash flood warning in my area. I didn't know floods could be exhibitionist. *^I'm ^so ^sorry*"

"My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair. It's ok though, she always comes crawling back."

"NSFW Anal With My Girlfriend When ever my girlfriend and I have anal; it makes my day, but it makes her (w)hole week"

"Remember how they used to call Bill Cosby ""America's Dad""? No fucking wonder most of the country has daddy issues."

"Ladies, if you've ever walked by a van with no windows and you're reading this, it's because you're ugly."