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Joke of the Day

"How about instead of shaking hands we nod at each other and that way we both won't have to wash our hands?"

Next Joke
 
"I hate it when you gain 10 pounds for a role... And then remember that you're not an actor."
"When I die, someone, please attend my funeral dressed as the Grim Reaper and just stand there and don't say a word. Thanks."
"Even if you're really tired, never try to hold your eyes open using toothpicks. DAMN YOU 1970'S CARTOONS AND ALL OF YOUR FALLACIES!"
"My wife worships me She puts burnt offerings in front of me everyday"
"My mating call in winter is just me shaving my legs."
"What do you call a gay date mixer? A meat-and-greet."
"""What? Why am I a part of this?"" - the horse you rode in on"
"""The quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach."" - The worst surgeon in the world"
"Sometimes when my wife tells me she loves me I get the feeling it's the tennis kind."
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