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Joke of the Day

"What does a stripper and a Subway sandwich maker have in common? They both prefer to be called ""artists"" instead of what they really are."

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"Where do you take a sick ship? To the doc(k)!"
"I was tickling my brothers feet last night, when my mum woke up and asked me to stop. Apparently I should wait until he is born."
"Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverlands. This is always funny because it never grows old"
"What do you get when The Dark Knight meets Edgar Allan Poe? (x-post from r/funny) [Poetic Justice](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_me6ovqdnAp1rzkyaxo1_500.png)"
"Incontinence Hotline Could you hold, please?"
"It only takes 3 inches to please a woman And it doesn't matter if it's visa or MasterCard"
"""please human with me"" - bear"
"How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They don't believe in a higher power."
"Doc: have you been displaying any symptoms of vampirism? Me: I've been.. Doc: ... Me: ... Doc: ... Me: ... Doc: ... Me: Coffin. Doc: get out"