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Joke of the Day

"Ladies, if you don't want men looking at your cleavage then you shouldn't wear low cut shirts in an area I can see you with my binoculars."

"Panty-less waxed woman hanging off a bridge ""I'm gonna jump into that canoe"". Me: ""No that's your reflection""."

"I found my wheelie bin in the middle of the street this morning. If I hadn't brought it back in, it could have wheelie bin dangerous."

"Why was the dyslexic rabbit disappointed when he received the solid gold bar he had ordered via the internet? He thought the ad said '24 carrots'"

"My buddy used to say ""why should I wash my towels? After I shower, I'm the cleanest thing in the room."" He's still single."

"Did you know that the illuminati created golf as a way of harnessing the world's most valuable energy source? Angry old white men."

"Your check a$$hole light is on."

"Why does nobody like to sit next to Elsa? Coz...she ""let's it go!"""

"Q: how can you tell it is almost St. Patrick's day? A: Everyone is taking out their Paddy-o furniture."

"Why don't smart girls ever get pregnant? Because they use their head."