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Joke of the Day

"I imagine Hell is just a place where you watch a montage of people's hands you've shook that didn't wash them after they used the bathroom."

Next Joke
 
"I'm participating in some vintage ploughing this weekend I'm visiting the local retirement home"
"What screams, wails, and lights up? A bus-load of babies on fire."
"How do you know if somebody's Christian? Don't worry, They'll fucking tell you."
"There was a spider in my bathroom so I threw the cat at it. The spider is dead but the cat's pretty pissed"
"Today my girlfriend left me Because I have a Linkin Park obsession... ...But in the end it doesnt even matter..."
"Please don't tell me about your methods of increasing drag on your car It would be a spoiler alert"
"What do you get when you mix a car and a refrigerator? A car-brrrrr-etor I'll see myself out."
"When British people get something stuck in their teeth, it's usually just another tooth."
"Q: When Do You Hurt a Midget? When He is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice!"