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Joke of the Day

"If 1 in 5 Women get raped Then why don't they just travel in packs of fours?"

"Why can't black people swim? Because the cops will arrest them"

"I thought I had lice. Then I remembered I was in an Asian restaurant."

"Why does Bernie know he'll win the elections? Because his good friend Nostradamus told him he would."

"What did iodine say to Xenon when caesium died? Well, I guess we better Barium."

"What's the difference between lobsters and crabs? I don't *have* lobsters!"

"lady at table behind me: sometimes babies get gassy. they can't burp so they get mad and cry me, turning around angrily: its not JUST babies"

"How do you stop a ginger from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head."

"I have a habit of standing naked in the laundry room wondering what to wear. This may have contributed to my immense popularity in college."

"Saw a bird at my feeder shit on another bird's head and that bird just kept right on eating. I've never before felt this close to nature."