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Joke of the Day

"Real girls have curves. A real girl is just one long, continuous curve. Do not date girl unless she is a parabola."

"How do you get a homosexual man to have sex with a heterosexual woman? Shit in her cunt. (its just a joke people)"

"I've got an Uncle Rube. I mean he's really my mother's sister's roommate's friend's hairdresser's step-dad, but the effect is the same."

"What do Grammar Nazis support? The Third Write"

"ME [8:49PM]: on my way, taking a crab GF [8:50PM]: u mean a cab ME [8:52PM]: not exactly. be there in several days"

"I went to the movies with a girl last night. I paid for the tickets & the snacks, & anything else I can before she reports her card stolen."

"What's grey and moves at a hundred miles an hour ? A jet propelled elephant !"

"Somebody stole my mood ring... I don't know how I feel about it."

"[date] ""don't let her know ur from twitter"" Her: whats wrong? Me: This fork only has 3 prongs Her: So? Me: it should be called a threek"

"Pigs What is s pig's least favorite game"