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Joke of the Day

"What do you get a body builder for Christmas? A dictionary, so they get plenty of definition."

"if your newborn baby has a full head of hair that means it is a business baby and is ready to enter the world of finance"

"Why was Jesus I such good shape? Crossfit. Why did the Romans hate Jesus so much? He wouldn't shut up about crossfit."

"Arianna Huffington said Donald Trump is not getting enough sleep, so why isn't he getting enough sleep? Apparently not having enough **Melania**tonin at night!"

"TIL that my neighbors really like the metal song i'm playing on my 7.1 sound system I figured because he thrown a brick at my window to hear it better ! \m/"

"Why are dyslexic zombies such good plumbers? Because they're always looking for drains."

"Why do they put fences around cemeteries? People are dying to get in."

"They say you've got to spend money to make money. Feel like there's some middle step I've been missing?"

"Everything doesn't ""happen for a reason."" The universe is not aware of your existence. Stop being arrogant."

"Why is the cook worried about catching his runaway pig? He knows a little ham goes a long way."