99095
Joke of the Day
"I like to finish everyone's drinks at parties and then call them out for being drunks."
Next Joke
"I threw out a sheep, a drum and a snake from an airplane Ba-dum-tss"
"*brings a gun to a knife fight* *brings a gun to a pillow fight* *brings a gun to a food fight* who keeps inviting this guy"
"Why couldnt you trust Castros wife? Because at one point, she was infidel. Ok ill leave now"
"I'm gonna name my daughter Retarded So I can say yes whenever someone asks me if I am fucking retarded"
"if you're ever worried there's an intruder in your house, shout 69 down the stairs. if no one laughs, there's no one there"
"California is getting so much rain right now... ...that even Caitlyn Jenner is getting wet."
"OCD My little cousin has been diagnosed with an unusual case of OCD where all he does all day is organise dinner plates by the year they were made, It's an extremely rare dish-order........"
"me: ""okay I might as well just say it..I love you"" girl dinosaur: ""omg u have no idea how long I've waited for u to say that!"" *meteorite*"
"I can't count how many times I failed maths at school."