33007

Joke of the Day

"me: ""okay I might as well just say it..I love you"" girl dinosaur: ""omg u have no idea how long I've waited for u to say that!"" *meteorite*"

"Adam: How did Mummy know you hadn't had a bath? Eve: I forgot to dirty the towel wet the soap and flood the bathroom."

"Why do ecologists like lepers? Because they're biodegradable!"

"I won a swimsuit contest the other day I ate 57 swimsuits"

"A girl told me she liked teasing So we went into the bedroom and I told her that she had a weird, misshapen nose and she suddenly started crying. Women and their mixed messages."

"Why are there commercials for milk? Who still doesn't know about milk?"

"No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves."

"I made half a cup of tea the other day... It was so nice I had two."

"Wheelchair athletes have just been banned from the Paralympics They tested positive for WD40"

"Shout out to the dude who's followed and unfollowed approximately 25632 times this week."