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Joke of the Day

"So it's world Philosophy day today and I was trying to think of something deep to say... The best I could come up with was lagoon."

"A skeleton walks into a bar... and he says to the bartender... ""Give me a beer and give me a mop!"""

"What do you do if the lights in a Chinese food restaurant are too bright? Dim Sum."

"Sorry you handed me your baby and I immediately put it in the garbage I thought that's what we were doing."

"At the police station a) Somebody stole my wallet. b) When did this happen ? a) I don't know he also stole my watch."

"If used correctly, Twitter can be used as an antidepressant. Just don't take it as a suppository."

"I'm a Mexican with a black belt Call me Juan Punch"

"What is a dentist's favorite dinosaur? A Flossiraptor! I'll just show myself out..."

"I got a 2nd job..It's not official..I dress like a host at T.G.I.Fridays, then I pick up credit cards & say ""Be right back""..I don't go back"

"What is it called when a man molests with each release? Per version."