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Joke of the Day
"What do you do if the lights in a Chinese food restaurant are too bright? Dim Sum."
Next Joke
"well technicaly my oficial title is ""head research scientist in the field of DNA sequencimg manipulation"" but u can call me ""gene hack man"""
"Why cant the bike stand on its own? Because its two tired."
"It's odd to hold a ""World Series"" and not invite other countries. But it's weirder to hold a ""Miss Universe"" and not invite other planets."
"Cop: Is that a turtle? Me: ... Cop: Painted blue? Me: ... Cop: With nails glued on? Me: ... Cop: Mario Kart's not real Me: YOURE NOT REAL"
"911: What's your emer- She said don't get her anything for Valentine's Day! 911: And you didn't? No! 911: Placing you in protective custody."
"Difference between your wife and the economy? 5 years later, the economy will still suck."
"Are you a witch? Cause I heard you like riding broomsticks."
"Male ladybugs prefer to be called ""bugs."""
"Ironically its exactly 12 steps from my car to the liquor store"