98935

Joke of the Day

"Why hadn't the law graduate and the bartender ever met? The graduate never passed the bar"

"What kind of quack doctor prescribes an odd number of pills for OCD?!"

"LOIS LANE: *pulls back from kissing* clark your glasses are hurting my nose can you take them off CLARK KENT: no"

"Everyone on Instagram has pics of them at places all over the world & I'm like here's another shot of me from a different angle on my sofa"

"What is a duck's favorite dance ? The quackstep !"

"They say that when you put your ear next to a vagina... You can actually *smell* the ocean!"

"To be honest, I panic a bit right before I have to pronounce Worcestershire sauce"

"I think my cat is using me for my money I mean the sex is great, but I just don't feel an emotional connection."

"Him:I'm not going to use this taxi company again. They nearly killed me this morning Me:don't be so hasty darling...give them another chance"

"I've never met a full on jew They were all just sort of jew-ish"