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Joke of the Day

"A dad walks into his daughter's room and saw her fapping with a cucumber, he said: Hey! I was going to eat that, now it's going to taste like cucumber!"

"Where are average people made? The satisfactory"

"Chuck Norris uses tabasco sauce instead of visine."

"How do feminists get away with murder? They won't let anyone finger them."

"What do you get when you cross a pig with a canary? I don't know but when it sits on your electric wire and sings all your lights go out"

"Her: I think you're getting too into those Hobbit movies Me: *stops gluing a beard on the baby* what?"

"Why did Ms. Frizzle get fired from teaching Sex Ed? She told the class to take chances, make mistakes, and get messy."

"What does a necrophiliac get at a funeral? Mourning wood."

"Made a hiking playlist earlier called trail mix It has a lot of eminem in it"

"What happened when the cannibal showed up to the buffet late? They gave him the cold shoulder."