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Joke of the Day

"My kids challenged me to a cartwheel contest. Long story short, now my chiropractor has a new boat."

"What do a Yugo and a bath have in common? You can't step out of them in public."

"What do you call a happy Russian? Gladimir Putin!"

"To be, or not to be, that is the question. Answer: FF [why?](/s ""2B OR NOT 2B = FF"")"

"We only have world peace today thanks to the tireless efforts of thousands of former beauty queens who didn't give up on their dreams."

"How does a mathematician deal with constipation? He grabs a pencil and tries to work it out"

"Why can't you trick an aborted baby? Because it was not born yesterday."

"i have a very frustrated pet at home... its a turtle that loves to chase cars"

"ADELE: hello from the outside ME (closing blinds): a restraining order means nothing to that woman"

"When I refer to old relatives passing away I never say ""RIP"" because I don't wants them to rest. I want them to Zumba."